19th August Meeting - Alvia Turney - Separation Consultant

Chair
Judy - The Club was given a new bell from Merv freshly back from his overseas trip - some concerns that Merv had been radicalised while in Syria are being followed up by ASIO.

Despite no International Toast, Judy made us pay by not giving the direction to sit down till well into the meeting.
 

                            Potential guests

Visitors & guests
Alvia Turney & Margaret Hayes
Naomi Lewis - NYSF student and dad Terry
Ken McMeeken, RC Morwell (last visit this holiday)

Apologies 
Alf, John & Pauline, Norm and maybe someone else I missed

Makeups
Deborah at a cluster meeting
Judy at public a relations & membership workshop
Merv at an ambulance meeting

President's Report
Welcome visitors & guests & special welcome back to Merv and thanks for gift of the bell.  We are now worried that Genta may present the Club with a large and noisy gong.
 
Deborah had a Cluster meeting on Sat with an interesting exchange of ideas including from Alex, Maroochydore, Mooloolaba and Kawana.  Members are encouraged to make up at Kawana - they meet Monday Nights somewhere, we think maybe at the SLSC.

Sad news that our Global Grant proposal has been rejected.

We now have an agreement with the Salvation Army for use of the shed and our new shelving is being painted by Men’s Shed.

NYSF
 
Naomi thanked us for our support through the selection process - the interview was nerve wracking but still vaguely casual.

Speaker
Pam introduced Alvia, who has 20 years training & teaching background and is a neuro-linguist (whatever that is)  After five years research she came up with “Act 4 Tomorrow”

Alvia started by saying that she is not an advocate for “breaking up” and is proud of her parent’s recent 57th wedding anniversary.

But currently there are more divorces than in the past, and they don’t need to be as unhappy and expensive as they often are.  Many of Alvia’s clients are “very young” and she feels that relationships are not being nurtured. Her advice is “don’t rush in”  Her own divorce in 2001 after her husband’s second “affair” left her a “broken” person and her experience through the legal channels left her feeling there must be “another way”.

A divorce is not “life threatening”, it is simply a breakup, but there are finances, maybe a house and children to consider.  Considered together the decisions can be overwhelming, but they can be broken down into simple components - it’s just a process.

There are many reasons for breaking up from violence, to just realising “it’s done”

When selling her house after the divorce her agent was “so sorry” about her cancer - there was no cancer, she just looked like she was sick.  She ended up working with the agent in real estate for six years, doing some separation counselling as a sideline.

An amicable breakup is the best solution.  A large proportion of her clients have children either in Grade 1 or Grade 12.  Parenting plans can set out responsibilities in “a pleasant way”.  It’s not about winning, only the “best solution”

Statistics indicate about 50,000 couples divorce each year in Australia, but this doesn’t include de-facto relationships.  We need to do it smarter.

One in three Australian marriages end up in divorces, but internationally, China has 10,000 divorces/day.  Highest divorce rates are 55% in (missed it) 46% in US, 43% in England, and the lowest rate in Italy.

A quick shoe check here - no truth to the rumour I have a foot fetish

 
Directors
Genta thanked the Club for their support at the Happiness Forum.  In the speech contest, the judges couldn’t decide so so the eight contestants got $100 each.  The raffle made $200 which would go toward a Dicky Beach community garden.

Merv reported on our water & sanitation project in Gizo.  There is a trip planned for April next year to a location to the north of the Soloman’s closer to Bouganville.  A couple of the Men’s Shed guys are interested.  Clashes with our Japan trip.   Closer to home, the Ambulance is getting a new three storey building close to the hospitals in Kawana - top floor will be for accommodation for families of sick children.

Sergeant
Noel stretched the truth as usual and gave out free home grown limes to ease the pain.